Mother & Miss

Letter from Miss Mother

Miss is my first born daughter, who is currently in year 9. She loves English but hates maths and is learning to play saxophone. She’s not a bad looking kid, in fact, when she takes the time and makes an effort she’s stunning…but her short life has been far from easy.

For 3 years, Miss and her brothers were in foster care, firstly in private care where they were split up, then with my mother. I lost care due to unaddressed issues involving anger management & mental health. I have Borderline Personality Disorder.

While in care, Miss was sexually abused, first by a young boy of the foster family she was staying with, then when in the care of my mother by a family friend (a young teenage boy) and also her brother. This led to a lot of inappropriate sexual behaviour from “Miss” especially towards young children. However, since hitting high school, this has shifted to older boys.

She lies, so often and so much I truly believe she can no longer tell fact from fiction. She’s been suspended countless times for fist fighting, stealing, she’s been caught smoking and drinking beer. She loves fashion but won’t respect her clothing, in fact, she seems to enjoy destroying her possessions.

Socially, the places she’s been banned outweigh those she’s welcome at. Last week she took a piece of glass to school and was caught self harming, while not deep enough to cause any real physical harm.


The first major step taken with “Miss” was to arrange for her to travel to Brisbane from her home area in the South West (where there is little in the way of the support she requires) to meet with members of the SCWQ staff. A treatment plan was then created for her.

This meeting proved to be quite successful, and we believed on the day that we could provide a great deal of what was required to get “Miss” on track to resume a normal life.

However, 3 weeks later, a violent domestic dispute in her family resulted in a fire which partially destroyed the house in which she lived, and at approximately 2 am on a Thursday morning, SCWQ Staff were working hard to keep a volatile situation as calm as possible while sending “Miss” and 2 of her younger siblings a place to live.

Despite the best efforts of SCWQ and the nearest Domestic Violence Support Unit, the nearest refuge accommodation available was in another city. By daylight, some clothes had been organised along with train travel to the other city, plus transport form the train station to the refuge.

For the next 2 months, 2 counselling sessions per week were organised by telephone to keep things on track for “Miss”. Due to her birth certificate plus other means of identification having been destroyed in the fire “Miss” was unable to attend school in this city, so SCWQ arranged with her previous school to have as much of her educational requirements as possible forwarded to her by mail.